Our spleens and the tricks we have in stock

Now I, Orphi, tell you about Ikis spleens and tricks:
As Iki told you, he is very frisky. Whenever something is moving somewhere Iki is on the spot to explore it. His greatest spleen of all is his cave-instinct. Anything comparable with a cave is Ikis new home. He crawls into boxes and clothes baskets, under beds and under closets, into our washing machine and under the sheets of mattresses. Then he is called "worm" because he looks like one under the sheets.
He always goes to the toilet, when Mummy has cleaned it. Once he used the empty, recently washed litter pan. Mummy decided that this was funny even though she had to clean the litter pan once more.
Furthermore Iki likes to drink out of "two-legs"-water-bowls. I think these are called drinking glasses. We have many water bowls but Iki prefers to drink from the glasses or jugs of the "two-legs". I don't understand this because I really love over water bowls.

His best trick is his miserable clamour. Whenever he wants something he looks really cute and shrills and shrills and shrills. Because of his health problems when he was a baby the "two-legs" grant him every wish.
His second trick to attract attention is to jump on the TV, sit down and dangle his tail before the screen. When nobody reacts one of his paws appears. He thinks that this will always work but sometimes he even tries it when the TV isn't on!! You should hear Mummy's laughing!!

And now it's Iki's turn:
The first thing to mention is Orphi's faible for cotton swabs. He always tries to steal them out of the bathroom and he hides them everywhere in the flat. Mummy doesn't like this and removes them because she doesn't want him to eat the plastic. The bathroom door is shut all day long but somehow he always gets new ones from one of his hiding places. Noone knows where they are not even me.
Actually Orphi is the laziness in person. Even so there is one toy that interestes him: tinfoil - from yoghurt cups or pure aluminium foil. I don't know if he likes the glittering or if it smells good for him. I'm not very interested in this silly thing because I have my beloved goldfish.
Whenever he wants to be stroken, he demands it in quite brutal way. Most of the time he simply jumps on Mummy's belly when she lays on the couch or he presses himself between Mummy and the keyboard and plumpses on her hands. So she cannot write anymore. During the whole manoveur he purres and grumbles. That's why Mummy calls him "Grumble-bear".

Every time when Christian is not at home and Mummy has to sleep alone Orphi wriggles to her and purres her into sleep. He gets his strokes, grumbles and paws like a maniac. Usually he injures Mummy with his claws and makes her screaming. But Mummy says: If you have cats, you must stand pain.
Most of the time he is real brutal. His claws are ready for action when we play or when he is stroken. He often beats me or the "two-legs". Mummy isn't bothered by this nor I'm. But the other "two-legs" are quite snivelling. When he is too rude and bites and scratches me I fight him tooth and nail.
Orphi is quite vain by the way. He washes himself nearly all the day. He knows how to stand or sit or lay to look especially advantageously. A good friend of the "two-legs" calls him "dressman" or "born model" what ever this means.
One of his favourite places is the show-case in our living-room. Or he sleeps on Christian's desk. There really dominates chaos and he places himself in the center of it.